T.C.B.

I stood up for a friend today.

This should not be noteworthy.

It’s as simple as that. Respect should accompany friendship, and action should accompany respect. Obviously I’d prefer that it all come with a side order of dignity, but I can’t afford to be picky.

Oh sure, we see people stand up for strangers, and have done it ourselves. This is good. But somehow along the way we stopped expecting our friends to stand up for us. “I can take care of myself” – I’ve thought, said and backed that up often. However, I’m not going to watch a friend be disrespected or mistreated. You wouldn’t either, if you thought of it that way.

The problem is in the perception. We see situations differently; one person’s joke is another’s insult. I’ve been there too, accused of overreacting on a friend’s behalf when I took offense where none was intended.

Judgment calls aside, let’s talk about situations where we know a friend is uncomfortable, right there, in the moment. Sure it’s awkward, you expect the friend to react directly. But you wouldn’t allow a general racist comment to go unchallenged, nor should you when something offensive is directed at someone you value -- even if it’s only implied and hanging in the air like a fart. I’ll light a verbal match to clear the air, and so should you.

“Friends help you move, good friends help you move the bodies.” Well, guess what. Speaking up for a friend isn’t on the level of moving bodies, and more people should do it more often.