Sunday, August 25, 2013

Skin Deep

We all know attractive people. I don’t mean people who are beautiful on the inside. I’m talking about shallow, superficial, probably genetic, good looks.

(Google inspirational blogs if you want a discussion of good deeds and purity of the soul.)

When I was your age, people used to tell me I was beautiful. I honestly never believed it, so hooray for a total lack of self-esteem! Not kidding. Think how arrogant Auntie might have been with self-esteem.

Eventually I started to accept that what I saw in the mirror wasn’t what showed on the outside. Coincidentally, that was about the time when “You look great!” turned into “You look fine for your age.”

Oh well. As a former (male) ingénue friend of mine says, “It’s better than no love at all.”

Relax. I’m not going to whine about Time and Inevitability any more than I would whine about traffic. What is, is, and what isn’t, sure as hell will be. Sack up now, sunshine. You’ll see.

Instead, I want to talk about how we defer to beauty. It’s okay, I do it too.

Of course people defer to wealth and power no matter how much we may bitch about both. But other than the most unlikely fantasy fulfillment, there is no expectation of reward from mere beauty. Like the rich and powerful, they’re not nicer, more generous or even more polite.

Unless they’re smart, in which case yes, they’re all that and then some because they know they’re memorable. Stupid pretty people aren’t afraid of karma. I’d say pity them, but we’re not gonna.

We’re still going to watch them when we’re out and about. They’ll be served first in restaurants and helped first in stores. You’re more likely to hold a door open for one of them. By my personal tally, one of them is more likely to cut you off in traffic than one of us. You can start keeping your own score now.

The good news is that pretty people are outnumbered. They’re also outclassed by the one thing that’s even more attractive than hotness, although it’s just as much of a trope. Just like paper covers rock, a sense of humor beats perfect features and a flawless complexion any day.

We might like to look at a stunning face and yearn for that fabulous figure, but if you’re stuck on an airplane for three hours, you’re better off with someone who can keep you entertained on the tarmac.

Yeah, I know should say something funny here but I have to go. I have a sudden urge to exfoliate something.

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